tuwenti-porK

Posted this on Facebook on my birthday (February 21, 2011). Just sharin' :)

Look who’s 24 today! Too old to be young and too young to be old, they say. But when it comes to lesions and lemons that life occasionally throw my way, I say, I’m still a kid who’s got a lot to learn. Listed below are 24 things, realizations, kembulers, and whatnots in my 24 years of walking ‘round ze Earth…okay, ze Philippines, with a Post-it stuck on my back that says “Kick me or I Kick U”.

Numbuh 1: When in doubt, wear black. (Please don’t comment about my skin tone, I know, I’m forever in doubt)

Numbuh 2: In school, grades are nothing but numbers so enjoy, make friends, and don’t be too selfish with your test answers—get into the habit of sharing. Heehee.

Numbuh 3: A writer’s only as good as his last article.

Numbuh 4: I’m not a perpek Englisher unless we speak Inglis in da haus often or I live in de America for many years or I’m an amerikano when I was a petus. So pak op! Wag magpapanggap na inglisero o mag-feeling porenjer kung mula split end mo hanggang ingrown eh Pinoy na Pinoy ka dahil nakakasuka. Well, maliban na lang kung si Charice Pempengco Pempengmo Pempengnatinglahat ka na at kailangan mo na talagang mag-ingles para maintindihan ng buong mundo. Ngunit post ko naman ito kaya pagbigyan muna.

Numbuh 5: When things get shitty, release, stand up, wipe yo ass, and flush it.

Numbuh 6: Friends whom you’ve shared your The Moffatts, Hanson, N Sync, Backstreet boys, and LFO days with are the ones who can definitely stand your craziness when you get older. Try calling ‘em up and say you’re finally willing to swap your Justin Timberlake poster with her Taylor Hanson centerfold.

Numbuh 7: Vampire and wolf sagas are cute only when the likes of R. Pattz and Taylor Lautner and Kristen Stewart play the roles. J.Lloyd Cruz and the rest of the Immortals? Uhh.. I don’t think so.

Numbuh 8: The last thing you’d want to do in a workplace is to make true friends.

Numbuh 9: Call it goal-setting, power of affirmation, law of attraction, or the miracle of owning it but whatever the documentary The Secret says, I believe, is true. In grade six, when my article got published in the school paper and, modesty aside, I was semi-declared as the first elementary student to ever be so and when my article about my Science teacher was published in Junior Inquirer the same year, I kinda had this feeling of ownership over a title—that I will become an editor-in-chief in 10 years. And poof! Hello Tinker Bell EIC :p In my Junior year, one friend asked me what my sport was. Of course, he’s unaware that handing out a cup of water was my sport then, so I told him Soccer/Football. Good thing he didn’t bother asking more questions; he must’ve realized that I was just pulling his leg so he said “Weh” and left. But thanks to you, my friend, for believing in me, I am now a football player. Next time I see you, Imma kick yo—ass? :p You attract and become what you think about most.

Numbuh 10: No one can put a talented man down. You may have skillz that killz but I got talent that—nevermind.

Numbuh 11: Padre Pio is real. I stand by what I say. HE IS REAL.

Numbuh 12: Never let your job title get in your head because after all, it’s just a title no matter how you inflate it. I’d go for an inflated paycheck than that.

Numbuh 13: That traveling ‘round the country ain’t baduy. It’s fun and enlightening, actually.

Numbuh 14: Sleep when you’re sleepy, or take a power nap that doesn’t go beyond 30 minutes or you’ll get a headache.

Numbuh 15: As Regina Brett said in her book, your job won’t take care of you when you are sick but your friends and family will. TRUE!

Numbuh 16: It gives this warm, fuzzy feeling, like you’ve found a new friend, when you’ve made amends with your sworn enemy way way back. Try texting or FB PMing your “unfriended” friend no matter how much you hated each other in the past and take it from there.

Numbuh 17: Once in your life, you’ll find your master—your guru—who will teach you the ropes and lead you to a straighter path.

Numbuh 18: Always be thankful.

Numbuh 19: It pays bigtime not to leave early in a presscon. Hello C6-01! :p

Numbuh 20: Give makeup discounts to bride-friends. They’ll love you for it.

Numbuh 21: I realized I never liked movies that have scoops of gore in it. But I love zombie movies—it makes my cousin clap 10 times whenever zombies attack and run after the bida. Seeing my cousin do that in a movie house is priceless.

Numbuh 22: Lablab your boypren and his family and they will love you back. Hello Iturraldes! Labyoooo Dada!!!

Numbuh 23: NO Family is ze beyst. We stick together through fatness and thinness; in sickness and in health; win or lose ‘til injuries make us fart.

Numbuh 24: Bigby’s restaurant and café, located at 3f, Mega Atrium, SM Megamall, is THE BEST!!!